From the New Yorker by Loretta Donelan

Note from Hannah: Loretta Donelan makes fun of  people who buy skin care products because they trust the crazy advertising some companies use. Why am I posting her article? Because there is a lot of truth in there in the sense that most advertising is misleading or worse. On the other hand, I am one of the people who try very hard to make products that live up to the ideals (yes, ideals) of making human life better by producing products that actually help.  So read the article and do the right thing: buy products not because of the advertising but because of the ingredients they contain.

Honest Skin-Care-Product Reviews

By Loretta Donelan

“Applying this charcoal mask makes me feel like I’m taking care of myself. Only negative is that it has no discernible effects.”

“This luminizing toner cost me a hundred and forty-five dollars, so it has to work. It just has to.”

“This is, hands down, the best regenerating lip pudding I’ve ever tried. Although I’m not exactly sure what it’s supposed to do, what I do know is that I’m slathering something on my lips every night. And, in this ever-changing world, with its karaoke apps and breaking-news push notifications and mixed signals from guys named Liam, aren’t we all craving a little consistency? 5/5 stars.”

“I’m addicted to this skin-brightening potion. Does it brighten my skin? Maybe! It looks brighter in the light, but it’s possible that that’s just how light works. At least it doesn’t have any parabens or sulfates.”

“This agua crème came in minimalist, ombré packaging and was labelled in an illegible, spindly font, so I knew that it was going to become a holy-grail product. Boy, was I right! It feels so light and gentle on my face, possibly because the only ingredient is water.”

“I’ve been applying this youth-boosting eye gel twenty-seven times a day, every day, for the past nineteen years, and I think it’s really starting to make a difference.”

“When I first started using this ultra-hydrating honey-dew moisturizer with extra de-puffing power, I was a little wary, because it turned my skin to dust. Every morning, I’d rub my itching, burning face and watch my flesh come off in my hands. Yikes! But this moisturizer, which is really more of a gel, has grown on me. Sure, my skin is still shedding regularly, but that’s all a part of the process. I hope.”

“The clay in this clarifying mask was scooped from the Dead Sea, near the spot where King David is believed to have hidden from Saul, so how could it not unclog my pores?”

“This sculpting powder is my go-to! One day, I hope I’ll find out exactly what it’s supposed to be sculpting.”

“This plumping glow serum was sold out everywhere, so of course I had to get my hands on some. After camping out in front of a Sephora, an ill-advised Craigslist rendezvous, and an eventful visit to North Korea, I finally found a bottle! I’ve been using it for about a month now, and, aside from the hives, I’m obsessed. I’m about to run out—how lucky am I that a woman on the crosstown bus agreed to exchange her bottle for a few measly ovaries?”

“I bought this radiance-boosting night repair oil because I needed to incorporate retinol into my skin-care routine. I don’t know why.”

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